Coping with depression (video)

Some pretty interesting insights about depression, anxiety, OCD, and other
issues that can make life quite difficult. Explores the origins of such matters,
how they manifest, and how to come to terms with them.

Hearing and reading about others experiencing the same problems can offer
comfort as well as alleviate feelings of confusion and isolation.

If you have had trouble identifying precisely what is behind mood swings,
irritability, stress, constant and unrelenting thoughts, try giving a listen.

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Bi Polar treatment naturally: Exercise

Through the years, I have found some actions which help
to alleviate some of the pain and disconnect which occur
regularly when cycling with bi polar disorder (a.k.a. manic
depression.)

It should be noted these are just suggestions for helping to
taper off the severity of this devastating illness, and not in
any way a cure or something to take the place of therapy
and medication. Like most things, it is a regiment of many
positive factors that produces the best results; all factors
coincide to make healing more effective.

Today, I'll focus on physical activity.

Exercise is incredibly important, and even though I have
many physical limitations, I strive to find ways to stay
active. I walk, I do yoga, I do light aerobics (dancing to
music,) and calisthenics. It all depends on mood, weather,
and physical acuity on a particular day what I decide to do.
That's where flexibility and assortment come in handy.

If I'm having a day where I don't feel 'motivated,' I have
learned to make myself do it because I know it is for my
own good, and the end results is that the post-workout
Robert will feel better for having done something, rather
than nothing. Even a mild, brief workout, or several small
and light workouts through a day are better than being
sedentary.

I always make sure to stretch out easily and well; I don't
rush and I don't overextend. I don't have anyone to impress,
and nothing to prove. My health and welfare is always my
top priority.

If I am especially stiff and sore, I'll do a soak in a tub of
Epsom salts. This helps muscles, joints, and relaxation.

On a day where I am sitting at the computer for an especially
long period, I do isometrics, which are toning and flexing
of the muscles in an isolated way so that specific muscles
get worked out. This is a good way to keep from getting
'secretary spread' and blood clotting. I also stand up and
stretch regularly to keep from atrophying.

Yard work is a good release; constantly changing jobs so
I don't overdo it on one motion (and then have hurting
muscles the next day.) Think of it as you would reps in a
workout. 10 minutes raking, 10 minutes squatting for
weeding, short break, 10 minutes hauling heavy stuff, 10
minutes mowing, break, etc. And of course always drinking
plenty of water, no matter the temperature.

When I work at the school, I am standing on a hard floor
most of the day, but I will take a few minutes once an hour
to do some deep bends and stretching to flex the muscles,
and I take a pair of tennis shoes to change into and walk the
campus during a free period.

The point is that I don't allow myself any excuses; not
schedule, time, mood, disability, or physical exhaustion.

No matter your situation or mindset, there is some form of
activity that can be accomplished. It's the effort of self-improve-
ment that has to be centered in the mind, not the apathy that
can sometimes deter us from starting.

And the endorphins released from exertion have a natural calming
and pleasuring effect when entering the bloodstream.

Another side to the exercise is that the better we look and feel,
it's one less thing to weigh on our depression. Keeping busy
and being generally 'in motion' is also a good way to keep your
blood pumping and your oxygen cleaning.  Staying off the couch
and away from the lure of TV, food, and other 'comforts' is a
good alternative.

Remember; Bodies in motion stay in motion, and bodies at rest
stay at rest. The easiest way to start is just to start.

(If you do have physical ailments, check with a physician to see
what sort of exercise you can safely work into your routine!)
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It gave me the same reaction

The infamous MJ crotch grab!

So while taking a shower last week, I was doing my
normal weekly self exam for testicular cancer.

I found something.

I couldn't even bring myself to consciously follow-up on
the finding until now, from a mixed bag of fear, denial,
and an all around week-from-hell on other fronts serving
as great distractions.

I also really don't need any more health problems right
now! Doesn't the body consider that when formulating
additional issues!?!?

The amount of growth in just one week accelerated my
concern to the "Get your head out of your ass and quit
procrastinating" stage. Now, it is not directly a part of
my gonad, but rather free floating, but it does seem so
much more than the possible less-harmful candidates.
And, it could still be a cyst.

Regardless, common sense and responsible nature insist
I get it checked out, and I am making calls this afternoon
to do just that.

For those men--or the women and men who love them--
who don't know how to do the checkup, or who are a
bit self-conscious, here's a link to check out.

Testicular Cancer Self-Exam

It's quick and easy, and knowing is so much better than
being caught off guard by something. The quicker things
are caught and treated, the better the chances of safe
recovery.

Be aware. Be vigilant. Be healthy.

Don't let the fear of a concept or possible reality make
you open to problems caused by overlooking and being
passive!


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"Why can't you just act right?"

Although it's hardly a laughing matter, I chuckle when
I think of the average person's misconception about
those of us with mental afflictions.

The above cartoon serves to illustrate how simplistically
most feel towards a condition like bi-polar disorder
(a.k.a. manic-depressive illness.) If only it were as easy
a notion as picking out a different shirt, from a clear and
conscious point of view.

I have, over the last few years, discovered an alarming
problem, even within the context of my already perplexing
illness of constant cycling from mania to severe depression.
The realization was that upon each new cycling (return) of
the depressive element, it worsens.

I have been unable to find competent care available for
a person without insurance, particularly here in the smallest,
most isolated, most backwoods part of Georgia, a state the
federal government had to file a lawsuit against for the
established incompetency in dealing with people with mental
illness. (You know it's bad if the government --Department of
Justice--has to get involved and say "You're killing folks!")

I thought perhaps I was even more 'crazy' than initially
understood, with these increasing lows (but, unfairly enough,
not increasing manias, Dammit!) I figured I would continue to
spiral until reaching an inevitable, horrid-enough existence
that suicidal tendencies would no longer be frightening, it would
be welcome release. I thought I was deteriorating into an
even deeper, different hole.

And then I read this book, entitled "Food and Loathing" by
Betsy Lerner, and she mentioned, simply enough, that bipolar
is a progressive illness, when not treated and maintained by
medication.

Now, I understand the chemical component of bipolar, and
that my brain can't materialize what it's incapable of producing.
But never, in any of my various readings and studying to find
answers through the last 28 years, had I ever seen anything
that mentioned the progressive nature of the disease.

I sobbed to read these words. Not because of the dire nature
of their portent, but because I knew that I was not alone; that
I saw for a moment there was a logical reason for what was
happening in my life.

No more idea of my being inferior, even for a 'mental patient.'
No more worry that I was descending into complete madness.
This was part of the party package that I had received (even
though most definitely not a requested one!)

I have found many ways to cope with the highs and lows of
this disease, and made peace with those aspects I cannot
control, but to know that this severity and fear I had faced
was not exclusive to me....that I was not just 'too weak'...
this was both revelation and uplift.

Maybe this message can reach someone else, too.

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January Retreat Script (part Five)

There’s a difference between ego and self-esteem.

Ego (out of check) is rampant in this country. Esteem, however,
is not. Ego is pretense, posturing, defensiveness, impressing,….
esteem is peace, self-aware, contentedness, independence,.
Esteem is not needing to be in competition; it’s feeling good
about self, exactly as you are—which of course means knowing
who you are. Breaking past societal defenses and illusions usually
takes us til late in life when we start getting real, and worrying less
about attention, approval

We have to determine what our self-interest is, and stop identifying
through others’ notions reflected back at us.
How do you feel?
What do you want?

Learning to own your own space takes time and practice. Our
motivations should be internal, not external. Are we directors in
our own world, or spiraling at the mercy of others’ boldness?

We have to be active and aggressive, not passive in life. Allow
for our insights/abilities/understandings to be different and unique,
and still feel as proud and supportive of them.
Do others seem bigger and more important?
And, is that notion real or perceived?
Do another’s accomplishments diminish or thwart our own?
Do we self-sabotage by imagining that others don’t share the
insecurities, fears, and pain that we do?

Why are others able to speak thoughts, do what they want,
but we “can’t”?
Do we imagine a separate set of rules, while our self-con-
sciousness and resentment and attitude actually promote an
energy that shuts us down?

We are our own single most important asset; If we don’t
look out for self, then we are not fulfilling our goal and our
directive.
The world doesn't need victims or martyrs; goodness
doesn’t mean giving in to people in this world. We have the
ability to stand up for ourselves, to change our lives, if unhappy.

When we blame another, we relinquish control of our lives.
We give our power to others. We give up the pressure to decide
our own fate. When we want others to pay attention to and love
us, care for us, feel for us, we ask others to take on a job that isn’t
theirs; we give up responsibility. We manufacture dependence, and
thereby weakness.

Our emotional lacking and pain comes from not being connected
enough to ourselves, our needs, or life. When we accept
and love ourselves as we are, and fulfill our designation, we find peace.

Independence, self-sufficiency are not bad character traits.
They’re necessary to staying alive and find contentment.
We’re able to bring a whole person to our relations....
to be complete when alone.
Have the basis of every charitable act be genuine giving, not
receiving of attention, or impressing.

Being at peace with self leads to being at peace with others.
There can never be enough praise or attention to alleviate our
own low self esteem. Our sense of self must be acknowledged
from within. Even a belief in a truly loving god requires us accept-
ing the ultimate love, which means accepting ourselves.

EXERCISE:
Imagine walking into your home as if you were a stranger.
 What would your perception be?
Is it good enough?
What would you change?
Would you judge it if it were someone else’s home?
Why do you keep it the way you do?
Do you treat yourself as well as you would a loved one or stranger?
 If not…why?


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